Good evening subs
As a few of you may have noticed, I’ve not really been around much for the last few years. I was on a quest to utilise My business qualifications to see if I could fit into the business world as an employee. What I realised very early on was that this role was not suitable for someone with the predilections and outgoing personality that I have. I am not submissive by any means, which meant that working for an employer was damn near impossible and caused a great amount of conflict within Me. Nonetheless I pushed on through for the last couple of years and tried to fit in. The truth is, I will never fit in. I am meant to lead, not follow.
I found it excruciating to watch people day in day out passive aggressively communicating. back biting and trying to work together when none of them wanted to be there in the first place. I saw new people arrive and watched their sense of self, optimism and joy become slowly eroded. The toxicity and negativity was seeping from the walls in many of the organisations I tried. I watched big bosses controlling others who had given up their sense of self to become ‘Yes men/Women’. It was heartbreaking to watch. I would sit there seething under the surface watching how others would whisper to avoid any narcissistic injury to the powers that be of that organisation. It knocked me sick! It did not resonate with Me at all.
As you all know, in between all of this madness, I continued to session on a part time basis with my long term loyal subs who have served Me for up to 9 years or so, maybe longer. I’m sure you guys saw the shift within Me as I suffered trying to achieve a connection with what is considered as ‘normal’ working life outside of the fun in the Chambers. As much as I was excellent at My career, I was not excellent at taking orders or being asked to think ‘inside the box’. That is not my style! I’m a free thinker and a creative. My sessions are all based around letting My free thinking and creativity flow and thinking ‘outside the box’. The office life in comparison was stifling that energy. I almost lost myself for a while.
Today I gave My notice at work. I decided that enough was enough. I refuse to work in a world of restriction, lack of creativity and control. I’m a free spirit. So this afternoon I walked away from the grey downtrodden faces and repressed angry individuals of the office world and drove to the chamber to be amongst My Mistress friends. I walked into the doors greeted by the sight of strong independent women covered in leather and latex laughing as the dungeon slave dressed as a maid wearing a humbler came through the other door. My heart warmed and I immediately felt peace and at home. The smells of the leather, the groans of the slaves, the laugher and cruel warmth of My Mistress friends filled Me with joy.
The contrast from where I had just left was surreal. I know where I belong and its not in the world I tried to fit into. Having a fancy business job and title doesn’t make a person happy. It only serves as an ego stroke. This experience has certainly changed My perspective on life. I don’t regret any of it. I have learned many painful lessons. We all have to go on a journey of self exploration at some point in our lives. To see the truth of who we are and what makes us happy. Not everyone is cut out for the 9-5 mould. I’m not!
So the good news is that I’m now back in the dungeon more or less on a full time basis by appointment only. I am open to meeting new subs, however I am low on tolerance with time wasters, so even the slightest hint of a being messed around then I will instantly bar you. I am also not one for long chats. My policy is to discuss briefly in bullet points via text or email what you wish to try in session, only then will we can speak on the phone to discuss it properly.
It’s good to be back properly this time.
By an enlightened Manchester Mistress Madox